One friend of mine is pretty adamant that women do not commit violence or prey on men and boys, at least not with any significantly measurable frequency. I’ve countered her anecdotallly by noting that on more than one occasion I’ve been on the receiving end of violent attacks, and so have a significant number of my male friends. That’s not statistical proof, of course, but violence against men is very rarely looked for or measured. I strongly suspect that women bear the majority of violent and sexual attacks, not the other way around. But the chances of men experiencing violence are high enough that the phenomenon shouldn’t be ignored.
Anyhow, this came to mind again because incidents like the following seem to be a daily occurrence. The response from many on the net, including me at times, is to see what the perpetrator looks like. As if the harm to a boy from having a pretty older woman abscond with him is somehow dependent on whether she’s attractive or not. Boys want to make it with hot women, so it can’t be harmful to them, right?
Frankly, I have no idea what the answer to that question is. What percentage are truly traumatized for life? What percent get messed up but no worse than normal teenage trauma that passes? What portion of boys that this happens to really feel fine with the experience? And is it really dependent on the looks of the woman? And can we draw any lessons from this to the wider phenomenon of girls being preyed on? I’m not saying by any stretch that girls just need to get over being victims. I just wonder if there are any parallels. Or is there any difference in how boys handle predatory behavior from men compared to that from women. In other words, is it really any less harmful to have a female teacher molest a boy than a male priest?
As I wrote, I think too often we dismiss the problem as insignificant. Then again, maybe it really is.
School fires teacher accused of ‘inappropriate’ relationship with pupil
The South Buffalo Charter School teacher whose disappearance led to a police investigation into her relationship with an eighth-grade student has been fired, two sources familiar with the case said today.
Cara Dickey, 29, was given her termination papers Wednesday, the day after she was found sleeping in her vehicle in Springville, the sources said.
Dickey was suspended with pay on Monday, and school officials escorted her off school grounds that afternoon. She then went missing until State Police found her sleeping in her vehicle late Tuesday morning.